My niece had her first day of kindergarden today. I am usually a little scared for my little ones; elementary school can be so influential on one's life. It was for me, anyhow (see institutionalized prejudice, bullying, bullying by a teacher, sexual harassment, as well as simply falling through the cracks). I have tried to supplement my nieces' government regulated education with controversial ideas like the people living here before Europeans were slaughtered in order for the colonizers to steal their land, homes, and goods, as well as Thanksgiving is a myth, and pressure to participate in religious holiday celebrations like is in violation of the separation of church and state -- including saluting the flag. I'm amazed that parents aren't up in arms about their children's education. I don't think I will send my kids to public school. I'm not a snob! Really! I don't like not having any control over who my children spend time with, and I REALLY don't like not having control over the quality of their education. Of course, I don't have any children. Yet.
I had my first day of the Fall 2008 semester today, at Cal State Dominguez Hills. I have five classes, three are English. I am taking British Lit: Victorian to Modern, Shakespeare, and African American Poetry and Drama. I'm revisiting a lot of lit that I love, including Othello, Romeo and Juliet, Heart of Darkness, and Raisin in the Sun, as well as reading some works for the first time, like Tennyson, Top Dog/Underdog, and Measure for Measure. I'm excited about these classes.
The instructor I have for African American Poetry and Drama is a really good guy. I don't know how to explain why I like him. I like his manner. He's an African American Literature specialist, and he's all about discussion in class. He just seems like a really good person. He also makes a concerted effort to dress and groom well and is always squeaky clean. Very polite, too. He is the instructor I had for Literary Criticism, and despite my frustration with the texts in that class I had a great time with him.
The other two teachers I have this semester are new (to me). There is Fuer, and White. Fuer is the Shakespeare instructor. She opened her introduction today by declaring that if we were taking this class under the impression we wouldn't have to read, write, or think, then we could drop, no questions asked. I loved that. She knows her stuff, she's tough, she wears her feelings on her face (I do too -- it's a blessing and a curse), and she hates nonsense and excuses. Finally. I've heard that her favorite thing to say is where is that in the text. A woman after my own heart.
Finally, the instructor I have for Brit Lit is boring, but not dumb. I have a feeling that it will be my least favorite -- there were already a lot of sub-par discussions in class. I'll try to raise the bar -- but sometimes I'm just outnumbered and banging my head against a brick wall. I LOVE Heart of Darkness, and want to expand my thesis for a paper, so it won't be all bad. And Great Expectations kind of follows that triangle desire diverted thing I've been thinking so much about.
There is a pack of about four or five students that I have all three classes with. One is this kid who looks like Dawson from Dawson's Creek, and who annoyed the heck out of me in Poetry and Restoration Brit Lit last semester. He would give these comments in class that sounded like he was really pleased that he seemed to be thinking critically, and gave them in such a way that he imagined he was doing everyone a favor in speaking his mind. In poetry class, after he tried to suggest that Blake was not using symmetry in his Tiger/Lamb poems I finally had to burst out and say, "What you're saying is absurd. It's not smart. It's not clever. It's absurd." I felt guilty afterward. Then, one day after class he came up behind me and swatted a bee away that had landed on me, I felt really guilty. I'm going to try to be more tolerant of Dawson this time around, but man, THREE classes, back to back. I think it was Blythe who said, it won't be the quality of your work that suffers, but the quality of who you work with will go way down. Have I mentioned that Blythe is right about everything?
I'm sure there will be updates as the semester progresses. The other classes I'm taking are Humanities: Gender, Race, Class, and Natural Disasters. Hey, they kind of sound related! Teehee.
2 comments:
I would never try to suggest that Blythe is ever wrong. I would only add that there are "Dawsons" (and far worse types) at every campus. Perhaps he can benefit from being in your company; you might challenge him to do better. And, lest we forget, someday you'll be teaching classrooms full of Dawsons, so it helps to understand them and where they come from.
He does sort of break my heart, and he is trying. Even with all of the negative energy that I tend to radiate when around him he has the courage to ask my opinion on a poem in class last Thursday. He's harmless, really. It's me. It's usually me, it's me this time, and I'm sure in the future it will be me.
Do you want to know something? I'm starting to get scared to death of graduate school. I have to apply in the next few weeks, and I'm terrified. I'm terrified that I'll get in; I'm scared to death of rejection. I'm worried I don't have the composition skills or the vocabulary of a literary theorist. I'm worried that I will let three more years pass before I have a baby; I'm concerned that I'll get pregnant and won't finish the program (assuming I get into one). I'm really anxious that I won't get in for Fall '09 and will have to teach high school (panic -- guns! Teenagers! Actually, I like teenagers. I just don't like violent teenage angst). Sometimes I wish I wasn't going for the PhD -- I mean a Master's sounds important...no, it doesn't. I'm scared. But I relish your support. You are a good friend.
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